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The eggs, the heels...
Frankly Speaking..
By A.A Fenty
Stabroek News
December 27, 2003
On this the third day of Christmas, I wish you the best you wish for yourself for the "season" and beyond. Even as I make two preliminary points.
Firstly, I'm only very slightly peeved that this year's Christmas Day - and the Stabroek - made me "miss" a Friday. But note as you read this very brief offering that I did not miss the week. Sorry, but it's not my fault.
Secondly, I promise that next Friday, like all those other serious columnists, and analysts and commentators and satirists, I'll touch on our society's serious issues. And yes, I'll try my utmost to be both neutral and analytical and profound!
So what's my caption today, "eggs" and "heels" about anyway? Well, to me it is about Ptolemy Reid's favourite term: Man's inhumanity to man. How come? Well how else do you explain one manifestation of exploitative consumerism at this season? I mean the unjustified, greedy, grasping, uncaring, unreasonable, and even inhumane, arbitrary hiking of prices on certain popular food-items during the week before Christmas Day. Twisted and turned however they tried, vendors could not really pass on the blame or reason for increased prices for certain sought-after commodities on the middle-men or on sudden "shortages".
It is always plain opportunistic greed that causes a seller to raise prices - even for his/her year-round regular customers.
That is why I was glad to be in a "don't care, Can't-touch-me" position not to even think of buying eggs at exorbitant prices, which will return to normal even as you are reading this. They wanted up to four hundred dollars ($400.00) per pound for parts of the cow's four legs - the cow heels which I like in the "traditional" pepperpot. I refused to buy! Then I compromised - with myself - and bought for some significant dollars more than I know to be normal. I concede succumbing there.
Just as the taxi-drivers, for no reason other than "exploitation", will raise the fares on Old Year's Day, sellers hold the vulnerable consumer who wants to sustain culinary and cuisine traditions on menus of the season.
The tricks is for consumers not to be cowed ever into buying over-priced ordinary items like eggs and heels. Do without! Let them keep their items and prices. Oh but we are so weak-willed. And divided. Think about it: Christ and his Birth had nothing to do with this type of seasonal rip-off. Resist exploitation. Buy when normalcy resumes. Be strong.
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Don't ban Christmas!
That's the English title of a Creole Short-Story I wrote for radio many years ago. It was a sort of literary response to an idea Forbes Burnham had in pursuance of his goal to promote local, traditional, "indigenous" observances. The nationalist Kabaka had proposed de-emphasising or miniaturising Christmas. In its place would be either Mashramani or some other observance - religious or not.
Many people, silently in those days, abhorred the thought. Rejected quietly to remove one of two of Christianity's most major observances.
In their hearts and souls most citizens rejected more "banning" and preferred addition or inclusion. Christmas, as we knew and know it survived.
I can't publish my whole story here, but for the fun of it, now hereby present some of the more draconian regulations the "fictional' tyrant wanted to impose. Imagine the society being warned that: as from the first of every December henceforth: 1) The Christian celebration in this country is banned. 2) Any citizen found playing, writing, listening or singing Christmas carols or songs, will be fined $50,000. 3) Any citizen found having, purchasing or erecting fairy-lights or Christmas Tree will be fined $50,000. 4) Anyone found sending or receiving Christmas gifts will be fined $25,000. 5) Any citizen found preparing, cooking, storing or eating such foods as pepperpot, garlic pork, black cake, ham, roast turkey, baked chicken, ginger beer, fly, sorrel or puncha crema will be fined $30,000. 6) Any person found forming or participating in any masquerade band or steel band shall be fined $30,000.
The tyrant also banned Christmas Holidays, early pay-days and late-shopping in December and even restricted the sale of paint, varnish, vinolay, linoleum, tapestry and such like. You can imagine the chaos, confusion and consternation in the country when the edicts and decrees were first issued!
Of course, the society's various and varied interest-groups, accidentally led by some rastafarians, galvanised and mobilised country-wide opposition and Christmas was saved. You all should read or listen to my short-story one of these days when you are saturated with life's numerous problems.
Coming soon next year...
1) Six-Head Lewis' mother thought she had problems getting a US visa? Now Minister Rohee is getting a hassle too! Unprecedented? Is there a real story here?
2) Minister Gajraj under scrutiny - and "Protecting the sources"
3) What will the airport cameras see? When they work?
4) Will there be zero tolerance on squibs on Old Year's Night?
`Til next year!